didnt blog for the past few days...so this is wat happen
8/8/04
itz was the day for the fireworks festival...ah xin managed to queue very infront so i went...my jie finally managed to persude my mom.i reach around 5 and i was so excited that i dun feel hungry at all. we went in at 6.30 like that...so excited lor.the ppl started playing those mtv and advertisments till like 8.30 like that the fireworks started.i felt so high!it was super duper nice!the fireworks branches out!!wow!never seen such a nice sight b4.then the bad news came...my jie say mom wan us to go back 1/2 and hour after the fireworks...which iz 9pm but managed to persude until a little later...but i have to get out of the place by9.30 lor which was the time the concert started!i was so angry at mother that tears of anger started to swell in my eyes the moment i came out of the piority area.the hp thing was all jam up and i couldnt find my sis,i cried the moment i saw her!i was so sad!i spent $20 to buy the shirt...in the end...i saw nth!not even a single artist!at least my jie saw R&B when looking for me lor!wah lao!i didnt talk to my mother for 2 days!i was super angry at her!y cant she be as understanding as other parents?haiz...my jie also felt very angry for me...she say iz one and only time...but then...wat did i see?haiz...*sob*ah xin say dun care larh...juz stay...but guess wat i say to her?cannot...my mother iz sick...later she even sick how...haiz...
9/8/04
national day!!HAPPY B DAE SINGPORE!i went to the national stadium at around 3+...didnt talk to my mother for the whole day.went to the parade with bin mother, brother and cousin.it was so fun!we sat at quite low...where the eldery and disabled sat(tts wat i heard) then onli me and his cousin playing around...again...the atmosphere was so high...we ended up the onli ones at the bench and the onli few around the area singing and waving...hahaz...itz was so fun!!!we were will crazy and shouting and shouting.his mother was so funloving and his bro so shy...but in the end we still talk alot...hahaz...it was such a fun night even though i didnt get to see the formations...gotta wait for the replayof the ndp...after the parade we went to eat...his bro took us in round and managed to walk to the shop...hahaz...throughout was so fun!and then we order...the thing he had in mind need to wait 1/2 hr...he almost fainted...hahaz...then we order others...we eat and laugh...it was so fun...so unlike my parents...haiz...then mother called...started scolding...say i didnt tell her today no sch...i was so angry...but gt other ppl around and i threw the phone to my sis...haiz...every thing had to be spoilt my her...why why why????i juz hope i have a family like bin...al the cousin...so nice...so unlike mine...nw i noe y jie like to go their house so much...i also wish i can go...reach home around 11...then we didnt tell her we are back...dun wanna talk to her...but in my heart im still concern abt her lor...all she keep saying we dun care abt her and this and tt...always never think of my feelings...she iz making me detest and hate her...haiz...i juz hate home now...and my jie iz going overseas soon...i will be all alone...juz felt like crying upon the thought of that...
10/8/04
i didnt really talk to mother today...onli asked her the postage muz pay how much...then i fell asleep...heard her quarrelling wif my jie...i heard everything which make me felt like...dunno wat to say...my jie wanna go her bf house...but she dun like him cause of some things...i think he very wu gu...she juz dun like him lor...my jie wan go then she always say jie never pei her...then the whole week at home iz 4 wat?she iz behaving like a child...so afraid that we will leave her...but i juz cant stand it anymore...the more she presurize me abt my studies...abt anything...the more my bad side will come out and rebel...haiz...i dun wanna be a bad girl lor...then she keep saying me grow up le lor...can fly bla bla bla...always say the same old things...xian...so irritated...no freedom..nothing...i felt like im being caged up...say my jie dai huai me...nt jie fault lor...ppl grow up le lor...IM NOT A CHILD ANYMORE!!!!!!!!urgh!!!!haiz....going to bath le...no time le...gotta go steven...see later come back gt time then blog...me gotta calm down now...

beary hugss-3:15 PM